I was drawn to Quakerism because of what I call "holy silence," the deep, contemplative silence that brings us closer to God, closer to others, and enables us to hear the "still, small voice" of the Divine speaking to us in our hearts.
In 1984 I started attending Quaker meetings in my hometown, Princeton, NJ, in an 18th century Quaker meetinghouse, built in 1740 on the wooded outskirts of town. Attending worship in this old stone building where Friends had worshipped for hundreds of years felt as if I were leaving the turbulent present and entering into a timeless, eternal realm. Quaker worship brought healing to my troubled soul at a time when I desperately needed it.
During graduate school days (1976-82), I attended Nassau Presbyterian Church in Princeton and experienced some of the most profound and thoughtful preaching I've ever heard. The Princeton Presbyterians held their preacher to high standards because of the nearby Presbyterian seminary and I felt privileged to learn from such learned and gifted men of God.
After attending Princeton meeting for a month or two, I began to miss these powerful sermons. While sitting in worship, I asked myself (and God) if I should attend the 9 am Quaker worship and then go to the 11 am Presbyterian worship, thereby having "the best of both worlds." I heard an inward voice say to me very plainly: "Do you want to know me and hear my voice, or do you want to hear sermons about me?" It was clear that I had to choose one or the other. I opted for Quaker worship and am grateful that I did.
After a year or two, however, it became clear to me that I was free to go to programmed worship services and listen to sermons from time to time. In 1989 I married a Methodist pastor I met at Pendle Hill, a Quaker Center for Study and Contemplation, and loved her preaching, which was so deeply spiritual it sometimes brought me to holy tears. I came to appreciate the Living Word as well as the Holy Silence.
When I married my wife Jill, who comes from an Evangelical background, she accompanied me to Quaker meeting and appreciated the Quaker silence and open worship. But she also felt a need for hymns and sermons, as do I. During our daily devotions she practices vocal prayer, which I have come to appreciate. After attending the First United Methodist Church of Pasadena, along with Orange Grove Meeting, for several years, I felt led to join the Methodists while keeping my membership in the Quaker meeting. I am glad that I followed this leading. I feel blessed to attend both worship services each Sunday.
I realize that Holy Silence and the Living Word complement each other. When we speak out of the silence, inspired by the Holy Spirit, it can be transformative. And when we center down into contemplative silence, seeking the guidance and presence of the Holy Spirit, it can also be profoundly transformative, even if no words are spoken.
I must also point out that sometimes Quaker silence becomes a mere ritual, just as sometimes preaching becomes a mere performance, when it is not guided by the Spirit.
George Fox, the founder of Quakerism, warned against letting religion become an external practice governed by "notions" and rules rather than a heart-felt commitment to be faithful to God grounded in Holy Silence. John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, similarly called for prayer and preaching to come from the heart, and not just from the head.
To live a faithful and fulfilling life, we need Holy Silence and the Living Word. Hopefully, we can experience both, whether we attend "unprogrammed" Quaker worship or a conventional church service with preaching and hymns. The "best of all worlds" is the one in which we sense the presence of the Divine and are faithful to God's guidance. The Divine is always present, whether we are in a church, meetinghouse or in our car or a supermarket. As Jesus said, "I am with you always, even unto the end of the world.”* (Matthew 28:20, CEV and KJV).
Loving God, I know you are always with us, but help me not be distracted by this world and its pressing demands. Help me to hear and feel you in the Holy Silence and in the Living Word. Help me to stay focused on what truly matters--your healing presence and your blessed community.
*This is also sometimes translated at "the end of the age" (NIV) or "the end of time" (Aramaic Bible).
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